zondag 27 juli 2014

I know you!

I must admit that there aren´t a lot of people that are bold enough to say that to your face, but online people can be a bit more open with their opinions and thoughts. Which is fine with me but it gets a bit frustrating when they judge you!

A lot of times this knowledge comes from the way you look or the things you say, as if that is all that is needed for someone to figure you out. If someone actually believes that then I pity that person, because that doesn´t seem like someone that has a lot of personality. Of course there is so much more to people than that! Your hopes, dreams, thoughts, wishes and maybe even a little secret. These are all things that give shape to who you are and in the end you´re the only one who knows you the best. People will only get to know you as well as you let them. Sure they might discover things if they listen to you and/or observe your behaviour, but that´s often just a glimpse of the complete picture.

In a way we all wear masks, not always to hide yourself but sometimes for protection. People that don´t know you or hardly know you will often try to figure you out by looking at your mask, they see the surface and thus you must be what you look like. Some people are indeed not that difficult to figure out, but the arrogance to think you know someone without even giving that person a chance to express himself or herself is just foolish! People can be married for years and still have secrets, which doesn´t have to be something bad but it´s sometimes a side they keep to themself.

It´s an honour to really get to know someone, when someone is willing to share who they are with you. Not what they are, but really who they are. Such a bond is more than just words, it´s a sincere feeling of trust and acceptance that is more rare than you think.

zaterdag 19 juli 2014

Fantasy and reality, it´s not the same!

It seems silly to actually mention this but some people have a hard time seeing the difference sometimes, I wouldn´t even be surprised if some people can´t even see the difference. Which doesn´t have to be a problem, but somehow usually does end up being a problem for him or her. Of course you can ignore other people and live in your own personal world, which is perfectly fine as long as you stick to that and not involve others in your personal world because that´s usually where things go wrong!

Porn isn´t real? Big surprise, they´re actors and the situations might seem believable (not often though) but it´s all acting. Which means people that have a hard time seeing the difference between fantasy and reality might think that what happens in porn might actually happen in real life, especially if they do exactly what they did in that movie. An example of this is subway groping, this is where some guys think it´s ok to touch women inappropriately in the subway. Of course it´s often crowded and I´m not saying that everyone is guilty, but when someone deliberately puts his hands on you then I´d recommend to scream bloody murder! It might seem like overreacting but I´ve heard plenty of stories where women are being groped by random strangers because they think it´s ok. Guess what? It´s not!

So how do you tell the difference between fantasy and reality? It might seem weird but it´s often best to assume it´s not ok than to assume that it is ok, which means don´t touch strangers just like that and respect some personal space! It´s true that some people have fantasies about being touched by a stranger but then when they´re in public it doesn´t mean they want to be groped by the first guy they see. The thing is that a fantasy is often a fantasy, something you fantasize about but it´s not always something you actually want to happen to you. Well there are exceptions but usually when it involves strangers or something extreme then it´s often just a fantasy and not something they would want to happen just like that. If someone does have a fantasy they want to become real then he or she will want to talk about that, make an agreement about it so you avoid misunderstandings.

Even when you know someones fantasy then that doesn´t give you the right to go for it just like that! In reality it´s wrong to put your hands on someone just like that, especially when the other doesn´t want you to do that. It´s better to be safe than sorry with these situations, maybe some will say that you´re a bit reluctant but it´s better to hold back and get permission than to go for it and be rejected!

donderdag 10 juli 2014

Too hot for latex and leather!

I´m not talking about that you look so good that you shouldn´t wear latex or leather, which is ridiculous by the way! No I´m talking about hot Summer weather and facing unbearable moments while wearing your favourite fetish clothing. It´s the worst time of the year for everyone that can´t live without their latex or leather need. So how do you survive this season?

A simple but effective way to stay cool in latex is wearing it while you take a cool shower or sit in your bath with some cool water. It might seem weird but it actually works pretty well and of course it also feels pretty amazing! Unfortunately this doesn´t work so well for leather, at least I wouldn´t risk it! For leather you really have to find some cold spots in your house or face some unbearable sweaty moments, especially when it´s hot all day and night! Otherwise you could wear your leather outfits when the sun goes down, but don´t be surprised if it´s still too hot to wear leather. It´s actually even worse when you wear pvc, but I guess a true addict will wear whatever he or she wants!

Maybe you have to be slightly insane to wear latex or leather in the Summer, because it´s just not the best material for this time of the year. Something that you might want to avoid at all costs is rubbing against other people in latex, if you´re not hot then you´ll be hot if you do that! Once again this is the wrong kind of hot wear you sweat so much that you´re almost swimming in it. I know that some people get turned on by sweat but let´s not forget that a lot of people find it disgusting with good reason!

If you´re lucky you live in a part of the world where you don´t have any hot weather during Summer, but that often means that things are a bit colder in Winter. The good thing about Winter is that you can wear more clothes to protect yourself against the cold, unfortunately when it´s warm you need to take off clothes to cool down unless you have some serious equipment to keep yourself cool! It´s not easy to have a latex or leather fetish in Summer but to be honest you don´t need to wear latex or leather to enjoy it, which is actually a subtle hint to everyone that finds it unbearable to wear it in Summer.

zondag 6 juli 2014

Unwanted touching!

This might seem silly but it´s something that happens more often than you think, unwanted touching! So what is unwanted touching? It means that someone touches you but you don´t want to be touched or at least not by that person. I´m not talking about pretending to be important and people can´t touch you, no I´m talking about people that rub their crotch against someone else or put their hands on you when you clearly don´t want that!

Last week I met someone in a shop and we were talking, we were both dressed in leather and kind of stuck out among the other people in the shop. So while I was talking with her a man moved behind her and while moving past her he rubbed his crotch against her butt and put his hands on her sides. He almost whispered sorry and with a smile on his face quickly ran away. This guy could´ve easily moved around us but chose the path that would allow him to get close to her and rub his junk against her. Maybe you think that this guy is great for doing that but if you think that women are happy with this then you´ve clearly seen some terrible soft porn movies!

The woman I was talking with actually stayed calm, she didn´t freak out and didn´t yell. But I could see by the look on her face that she wasn´t happy! So what can you do about that? What should you do about that? Well you can make a scene in the middle of a shop but I think at that moment you don´t want attention drawn to what happened, you probably just want to forget it and move on. But it bothers me, because some scumbag gets away with being a pathetic loser and apparently this is normal. Oh people will say that it´s wrong and that guy should be locked up but in reality nothing happens, even when someone would be caught and sentenced then that person is out on the streets within a short period of time. But that doesn´t mean you should let it happen!

Perhaps it´s difficult for some people to understand but it´s not nice to touch a stranger, even when you know someone then that person isn´t always interested in being touched. Respect someones personal space! It seems childish but I think people have the right of having some personal space, it might be difficult in crowded places but when there is enough room to move around then you don´t have to get too close to others. This isn´t about asking for permission, this is about having some decency towards another person!