Especially people that are new to BDSM are curious about this, but it makes sense that someone would want to know. Some people don´t care if they´re refused but to others it can be quite harmful if a Dom/Domme isn´t interested in him or her because he or she isn´t an experienced sub. Which makes sense I guess, but I find it silly that a Dom/Domme would respond like that. Because if you never give someone a chance then how will he or she ever learn?
Nobody was born as an all knowing and experienced Dom/Domme or sub, we all started somewhere. Some people seem to forget that and can act a bit like a snob towards people who are not as experienced, of course it´s their decision and nobody can force a Dom/Domme to accept a sub but it´s nice if you´re willing to help and guide someone. That doesn´t mean that you have to accept someone, but instead of ignoring someone you can at least point them in the right direction.
Some Doms/Dommes even prefer an inexperienced sub, but I don´t think you should count on that. Some don´t mind but usually a Dom/Domme would prefer an experienced sub, but I wouldn´t give up just like that! Because there are several Doms/Dommes willing to teach or explain things to those that are willing to learn and listen. It´s a good idea to be honest about being inexperienced, even when you think that it might damage your D/s relationship because honesty is important!
I don´t speak for every Dom/Domme but I do think that there are a lot of friendly Doms/Dommes out there and it wouldn´t suprise me if there are people out there that are willing to help. I don´t say that someone that is willing to help you understand will also accept you as a sub. But the more you learn the better your chances are on finding a Dom/Domme for you!
Does it matter how you look? I´d love to say that looks don´t matter but that would be a lie, for some people it´s important and others don´t find it important. If you think your looks will influence your succes to be accepted as a sub then try something new, for example try a new look or spice things up a bit. But above everything just be yourself, don´t pretend to be someone or something you´re not! If a Dom/Domme can´t accept your for who you are then that Dom/Domme isn´t worth your time!
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