donderdag 29 augustus 2013

Sex in the stables

Do you know someone with a fetish for riding clothes? I doubt someone will openly admit that, not that someone should be ashamed, because it´s not a common fetish or at least not an openly known fetish. When you have a fetish for riding clothes it means that you like to see people in riding clothes, but when you´re straight I guess you just like to see someone of the opposite gender in riding clothes. Still it´s more than just watching, you want to feel it and taste it! So in a way it´s not that different then a fetish for latex or leather. But there is often another thing added to a riding clothes fetish and that is the location, this means most times being in the stables.

I´ve noticed that a lot of guys have this fetish for seeing women in riding clothes. Maybe it´s the tight pants, the shiny boots or the whip they´re holding. I guess you could even go so far that a submissive man is attracted to a woman that controls a horse, which is an animal that is bigger and stronger then she is. I´ve heard multiple reasons why men like women in riding clothes, but it usually comes down to him wanting to have sex in the stables with a woman wearing riding clothes. Some are very direct about it, but others can go into great detail how it would be and what they would want to happen. Then you also have people that like to include the horses, but that´s a direction I´m not going to discuss. I´ll leave that to someone else....

So what is so special about having sex in the stables? Well for your average person not much I guess, unless you have a fantasy of having sex in a pile of hay. Maybe it´s just the place to have sex when you meet someone special there, why go somewhere else if you can find a nice spot in the stables? Perhaps it could also be so that it brings out some primal force inside you, no logic or thinking about what you´re doing and just go with your primal feelings. I guess it has a different effect on all of us, maybe some people even find it repulsive to have sex in the stables. Well rolling around in crap doesn´t really seem like a turn on for me but maybe other people have different opinions about that.

I remember this girl I used to ride with, what I didn´t know back then was that she had a thing for me. After one riding session she stood next to my horse and out of nowhere started kissing my boots. She held my leg tight and slowly pulled me down and jumped on me. Usually I get turned on by riding, the tight pants around my crotch moving up and down on a leather saddle has a stimulating effect on me, so I didn´t resist her and went along with it. Was it the best sex I had? I wouldn´t go that far but it was one of the most intense moments I´ve shared with someone, just passion and instinct that lead to an explosive eruption in both of us. Sometimes you don´t need to think about something, then you know what you want! So maybe sex in the stables does bring something special out of you, but I guess it would really depend who you are.

donderdag 22 augustus 2013

You know you have a rubber fetish when....

I´ve never made it a secret but I´ll say it again, I love latex!!!! I know I´m not the only one, because the comments don´t lie when it comes to latex pictures. Still latex isn´t widely accepted and you don´t see many people wear in in their everyday lives. So what makes latex so unacceptable to be seen in it? Is it because a lot of people associate latex with a prostitute? I´m certain people will have their reasons for not liking it, at least that´s what they´re saying. But do people really hate it that much?

When you see a man or a woman in latex, you see they´re shiny body moving around and it brings out all the best of their body. How can you not feel an attraction to that? I guess with a rubber allergy you have a good reason but otherwise I´m just getting the idea that you´re fooling yourself if you hate that. I mean is it really so terrible when someone in latex is rubbing with his or her butt on your crotch? When you saw Catwoman in Batman Returns didn´t you want to lick her clean? I´d say you´re only denying yourself of great pleasure by pretending you hate it, but if you think you can live that way then by all means feel free to do so.

But how do you realize that you have a rubber fetish? Well it´s actually not that difficult to discover, just look up some latex pictures on the internet and if you get turned on by what you see then it´s safe to say you have a rubber fetish. Of course a rubber fetish goes a lot further then just looking at pictures. Because you want to feel it, taste it and smell it too! Maybe you know someone that has latex boots, gloves, top or pants. If you feel yourself attracted to them because they wear something made out of latex then that might be because of your rubber fetish or you´re just attracted to them as a person, everything is possible! But once you´ve had a rubber finger in your mouth and sucked on it, then you want more!

I can definately understand if people are reluctant to admit that they have a rubber fetish. Not everyone will understand it and many would want to make fun of you, but just remember that the people that make fun of you might have the same fetish (or maybe even something stranger) and are cowards for not daring to admit it! So when you experience a fantasy by having sex with your partner in latex they´ll just be stuck in the same old routine with their partner. I´m certain a lot of people have an interest in it, some might even have an entire fantasy about rubber while others are just curious. I´d say if you have an interest then explore those feelings and maybe you discover a side of yourself that you didn´t even know you have!

Rubber doesn´t only feel good, it also tastes good!

vrijdag 16 augustus 2013

Men that secretly love CD/TV but hide this from their girlfriend/wife

It´s no secret that there are some hot and sexy looking cd´s and tv´s out there, some can really make you stare at the screen as you´re amazed by their beauty. So I don´t find it strange that there are men who are in a relationship with a woman that look up these pictures. That´s not a problem, not at all. The problem is when they bother these cd´s and tv´s with obscure messages and try to hide their own lust for them. Is it so bad that you´re attracted to a cd or tv?

On datingsites it´s nothing new, when a cd or tv (or women in general really) post an ad then there are usually plenty of unpleasant messages. Some are the simple messages with messages like: you´re hot, I want you, suck my dick, etc. There are even men who go so far to contact them and start naughty conversations, but the moment they´re done (which doesn´t take long for most men) it´s over. They don´t contact the cd or tv anymore and probably go sleep next to their girlfriend or wife. Clearly these people are hiding a part of who they are, to like someone but they´re ashamed to admit it. Often their girlfriend or wife has no idea of these fantasies and adventures their boyfriends and husbands have.

Personally I find it stupid to treat people like that, a cd or tv is a person just like you and me. They deserve just as much respect and they shouldn´t be treated as jerk off material, something you can dispose when you´re done. Playing with someones feelings is cruel, but in a way people who behave like that are sad. To lead a life where they always have to lie, to the one they live with and to the one they talk to online.

Isn´t it better just to come clean? To tell your girlfriend or wife the truth, it doesn´t have to mean the end of the relationship and if your partner loves you then maybe you can talk about it. I´m not saying every woman feels like sharing her man with a cd or tv, but maybe you can spice things up in the bedroom. Maybe he has a fantasy to dress up as a woman, discover things together and play. Isn´t that much better than wasting your time online and waste the time of people who actually are looking for someone to be with?

zondag 11 augustus 2013

D/s relationships, how to make them work!

Some people think that it takes something special to make a D/s relationship work or some even believe that a D/s relationship won´t work on the long run. But to be honest, a D/s relationship isn´t that different compared to a vanilla relationship. It´s still about two people loving eachother, trusting eachother and spending time with eachother. The things you do in the relationship are a bit different though.

First of all you need someone that fits well with you, so having the same interests and kinks definately helps. But it´s not like you have different kinks that you can´t be together, as long as you can please eachother then I´m certain you can work things out. Just remember that if you have a fantasy of being in a gangbang that you partner might not like that, some don´t always say it but it´s nice if you think about the other every now and then. But it´s not just restricted to that, sometimes people just don´t like things and you can´t force them to like them if you want the relationship to work!

Trust is very important in every relationship, so a D/s relationship isn´t the exception. If you can´t trust the person you´re with then how can it ever work? If your partner ties you up and you don´t trust him or her, then you´re in for one scary experience! Trust must be earned, never easily given. Just because someone is a Dom/Domme doesn´t mean he or she is to be trusted. Anyone can call himself or herself a Dom/Domme. If you get to know someone and you have a mutual attraction then you can explore that or just go straight for sex. I would suggest using rubber, not just for protection but also to keep things spicy. I mean you´re in a D/s relationship so leave your vanilla coat at the door!

Are there really D/s couples that have been together for many years? As a matter of fact there are couples like that, it´s true that not everyone feels that way in a D/s relationship but it´s definately not impossible. If you´re interested in a long term relationship then it´s probably smart to mention this at the start, if the other just wants to fool around then it could be awkward to bring it up in bed after sex. So communication is also important, just like in a vanilla relationship.

Where do you find people interested in such relationships? Well check your local BDSM meetings or a fetish dating site. But it might be strange to talk to someone you just met and asking them to be in a D/s relationship with you, so don´t be a tool and go straight for the prize. Get to know the other and see if there´s a connection. Find out what the other likes and maybe you can use that to seduce them. For example if someone likes latex then wear latex, the same counts for anything else. But I would warn you to be careful that you don´t get carried away, you don´t want to tattoo yourself and then find out it was all for nothing. Also try not to be too much invested, dedication is nice but obsession is creepy!

Good luck!

donderdag 8 augustus 2013

When your boyfriend/husband loves anal

A lot of guys like the standard positions, they just do their thing and at the end of the show they go to sleep. But is that really how it goes for everyone? Did you ever had a fantasy where your girlfriend/wife would penetrate you? A strap-on is a good toy/tool for women who lack  the necessary equipment. But how do you know if your boyfriend husband likes anal?

Well it´s not something you can read on their faces, but when there is trust between you and your partner you´ll feel more comfortable to share private information. Even information that might be sensitive and something that they´ll want to stay secret for as long as possible. If you want to spice things up in the bedroom then anal is something different that you both can try, the fun thing is that it works for both partners. Wether you´re male or female, as far as I know most people have the necessary entry/exit hole!

Some guys are worried that having an anal fantasy makes them gay. Well for all of you who has this idea, don´t worry about it. If your partner is a woman, if you´re only attracted to women then you´re still straight. Even when your girlfriend/wife is inches deep with her strap-on inside you, it doesn´t make you gay. I guess there is a gray area when it comes to transsexuals, but if you see them as a woman and they want you to see them as a woman then in my opinion it doesn´t make you gay. You´re attracted to them for being and looking like a woman, so that still counts as being straight in my book! But there is no shame is being bisexual, so don´t worry too much about it.

A little bit of advice for having anal sex for the first time! If you´re the one penetrating someone for the first time then make certain that you don´t go in wild. You can really hurt and damage someone if you´re not careful! Start slowly and then you can increase the pace a bit, but for a first time you don´t want to go all rodeo style on someone. Especially if it´s also the first time for the receiver! If you don´t want to go anal then make that clear, no matter how much the other whines or begs. It´s your body and if you´re uncomfortable with something then don´t do it!

maandag 5 augustus 2013

Online Doms/Dommes

Thanks to our technology we can contact eachother from miles away, this makes it easier to form friendships and relationships. Also for Doms/Dommes it´s a way to get in touch with subs, but how reliable is this type of communication? Are online Doms/Dommes real Doms/Dommes or just pretenders?

It´s difficult to say who someone really is if you´ve never met him or her and the contact is only through messages online. But this doesn´t make someone a liar, it´s just another way of people reaching out to other people. Of course not everyone is who they say they are, so it might be tricky to find a real Dom/Domme. But there are ways of checking if someone is real and when someone is pretending.

Profiles without pictures are usually suspicious, because if you can´t even see one picture then they clearly have something to hide. Also be cautious when you see pictures that look too good to be true, I´m not saying that every attractive person online is a fake but people like to use pictures of other people when they are not happy with their own appearance. But it´s not all bad, some people are shy or they just don´t want to be recognized by family or friends. Pay attention what people are talking about, Doms/Dommes who know little about BDSM are either new or just not who they say they are. Don´t be afraid to ask questions, there is nothing wrong with some curiosity!!!!

So does an online D/s relationship work? Well it could, but just like an online vanilla relationship it will take a lot of work on both sides. Always be cautious though, some people like to get private information from you and that can lead to less friendly situations. My advice is to listen to your feelings, if you feel like you can trust the other then go for it. But if something feels wrong, even the slightest thing, then you should be on your guard.

For people who are uncomfortable at events or don´t have the courage to go to a Dom/Domme can always try to find someone online. Maybe if you build up a bond with someone you can meet up, but this isn´t always what´s necessary. But if you´re only going to have online contact then I don´t know how long it´s going to last, there might be a point in someones life that they want more. Maybe then you have to ask yourself if you want more, if being online with someone is enough....

vrijdag 2 augustus 2013

How to get in touch with a Dom/Domme?

I don´t know how good your communication skills are but from my personal experience I don´t get a lot of proper messages. Most of the time I don´t even get messages just invites to be friends with some random douchebag. I don´t know how this works out for them with other people but I seriously doubt that it leads to anything good. It doesn´t take a lot to say hi, besides if you don´t feel like saying hi then why would a Dom/Domme feel like adding you as a friend?

If you write to a Dom/Domme always be polite, don´t assume things and definately don´t go into details from the start what you want. A good idea is to first introduce yourself and tell a little bit about yourself, then you can ask some questions but for a first message it´s better to be short and to the point. What I mean with that is that you don´t talk about the weather or how much you like cats, it can be fascinating to talk about once you know eachother better but it´s not interesting to talk about in a first message.

Not every Dom/Domme finds it important that you write about him or her with capital letters. Like Him or Her, but to be safe you can start with that because some do prefer that or even demand that! Always be respectful, so it´s better to be formal than informal. Try not to be a suck up, some Doms/Dommes might like that but some really hate that. If a Dom/Domme likes that, then he or she will mention it. Don´t assume anything, get to know someone and then maybe you get an idea who he or she is. Just remember that you get to know someone as good as the other lets you.

So where do you find Doms/Dommes? Well you can find Doms/Dommes at meetings or fetish events. If you don´t feel comfortable around that many people you can find Doms/Dommes on fetish websites, maybe even dating sites if you´re lucky. A friendly reminder, just because you´re polite and friendly doesn´t mean that you get a reaction from a Dom/Domme. Maybe they´re busy, some Doms/Dommes get a lot of messages, or maybe they´re not interested. On a website try to have an interesting profile, have some pictures of you and tell a bit about yourself. If you go to a meeting or event try to look good and don´t act like a creep. That should get you further than hi how are you doing?