vrijdag 30 mei 2014

A Dom/Domme is only interested in an experienced sub?

Especially people that are new to BDSM are curious about this, but it makes sense that someone would want to know. Some people don´t care if they´re refused but to others it can be quite harmful if a Dom/Domme isn´t interested in him or her because he or she isn´t an experienced sub. Which makes sense I guess, but I find it silly that a Dom/Domme would respond like that. Because if you never give someone a chance then how will he or she ever learn?

Nobody was born as an all knowing and experienced Dom/Domme or sub, we all started somewhere. Some people seem to forget that and can act a bit like a snob towards people who are not as experienced, of course it´s their decision and nobody can force a Dom/Domme to accept a sub but it´s nice if you´re willing to help and guide someone. That doesn´t mean that you have to accept someone, but instead of ignoring someone you can at least point them in the right direction.

Some Doms/Dommes even prefer an inexperienced sub, but I don´t think you should count on that. Some don´t mind but usually a Dom/Domme would prefer an experienced sub, but I wouldn´t give up just like that! Because there are several Doms/Dommes willing to teach or explain things to those that are willing to learn and listen. It´s a good idea to be honest about being inexperienced, even when you think that it might damage your D/s relationship because honesty is important!

I don´t speak for every Dom/Domme but I do think that there are a lot of friendly Doms/Dommes out there and it wouldn´t suprise me if there are people out there that are willing to help. I don´t say that someone that is willing to help you understand will also accept you as a sub. But the more you learn the better your chances are on finding a Dom/Domme for you!

Does it matter how you look? I´d love to say that looks don´t matter but that would be a lie, for some people it´s important and others don´t find it important. If you think your looks will influence your succes to be accepted as a sub then try something new, for example try a new look or spice things up a bit. But above everything just be yourself, don´t pretend to be someone or something you´re not! If a Dom/Domme can´t accept your for who you are then that Dom/Domme isn´t worth your time!

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